The Older I Get, The More I Understand This

Results are often out of our control.

To worry about it, is fruitless, at the least.

The Roman Emperor, Marcus Aurelius believed:

“Ambition is tying your well-being to what other people do and say. Sanity is tying it to your own actions.”

Our own actions are the only thing we actually control. The rest is out of our hands.

In a vision I get when I think about this, I’m on the basketball court. Driving past my defender, toward the basket, as defenders are closing in, cutting me off from getting any further. Then, I see a shooter in the corner — wide open. No matter how much I want to take this play into my own hands, I know, passing to the open shooter is the right move.

Whether or not he makes the shot, isn’t the point.

If you’ve ever put your words out on the internet. Done work for clients. Or put yourself in any arena that places your work — or actions — at the mercy of other's opinions, you’ve probably learned this lesson before.

Worrying about your results doesn’t actually help produce better results.

Not only that it steals energy from doing the things that produce success.

I’ve recently had a run of disappointments in my day job that has been incredibly frustrating in the results column. Opportunities missed. Clients lost. Despite working the process the right way. Doing my job, the right way.

But as I sit back and reflect on these results, which I certainly don’t like, I’m confident in the process that I (and my team) took to produce the work.

It’s hard to swallow. But I’m learning.

Earlier in my professional life, I heard countless people talk about ‘the process.’ From athletes to writers to musicians to people in my field. As someone who grew up around sports, I understand, in theory, this idea. 

Still, to truly understand takes time. Patience. And, perhaps, a little baptism by fire.

You can’t appreciate this thinking until you’ve witnessed a few wins and unfortunate losses.

Allowing yourself to be free from the grip of results and live on the edge of only believing in the process is not easy. It’s unnatural. Difficult. It requires a level of trust or faith in something that you can’t see.

And let’s face it, we live in a results world. We work in organizations that study one number. Many of us live our lives under the constraints of one number. 

So to say it takes a little trust and faith to focus on the process taking care of itself is an understatement.

But I’ve come to believe that if you’re ever going to produce high-quality work, you must completely remove the worry of the outcome.  

On June 2, 2010, Detroit Tigers pitcher Armando Galarraga needed one more out to complete the rare accomplishment of a perfect game — the holy grail for any starting pitcher. On what would’ve been — and replay would later show, should’ve been — the final out of his incredible performance, the runner was called safe.

A play that will live in the minds of Galaragga and the umpire who got the call wrong, forever. If this play had happened in today’s game, replay would have overturned it, and Galaragga would’ve had his masterpiece.

So what can we learn from Galaragga’s near-perfect game?

You only control your actions. Everything else is beyond your reach.

Galaragga didn’t pitch any less of a great game than his results showed. While the box score will show he gave up a late hit, the process reflects a perfect game, slightly-not-meant-to-be.

“You have control over your own thoughts and actions,” Epictetus told us thousands of years ago, “but not over the thoughts and actions of others.”

In your life (or career) there are undoubtedly times when you work the process as well as you possibly can and it just doesn’t come to fruition. 

In its frustration, you have to remind yourself, quickly, that the only way to get past this disappointment, is to not allow any more energy to be stolen. Cut the ‘what if’ energy immediately. Put the focus back on the craft.

Review your process, if you must. Give it a quick analysis. See where you can learn from it. 

Then, get on with it.

Weekly Finds:

📚 Slow Productivity: The Lost Art of Accomplishment Without Burnout. I’m finishing this book right now and highly suggest it to any knowledge worker. This book is a great guide for producing higher-quality work, without flirting on the edge of burnout. Our digital, knowledge-on-demand, lifestyles are not sustainable without building better mental models to guide us. Newport’s work has been highly influential in my life. I also highly recommend his book Deep Work. 

(If you want more book recommendations from me, subscribe here.)

📝 Success Is a Multi-Generational Project by Art of Manliness. I really enjoyed this short, but powerful piece about success being more than just what you do. Here’s my favorite quote from the piece: “Success is becoming the kind of man your ancestors would be proud of, and your descendants will be grateful for.” I highly recommend this piece.